The three weeks to go.

Three weeks ago Helvi took a fall. The surgeon informed us; ‘it will take a year to heal.’ I believe he wanted to let us know there will be a long healing process. It is always better to overemphasize than give false hope. I know positivity does make better and heal things faster than the Jeramiah opposite but even during the last few weeks things are looking up. We have at least managed to get some synchronicity in our ‘ bathroom’ functions, especially during the night, which made an amazing difference. There is now a rhythm in daily affairs.  Have any of you dear readers ever had to put dentures in your partners’ mouths? Try it.

I have learnt that the little things that men expect women to do on a daily basis is a lot more than are given credit for. My dad always felt entitled to put his feet up after work and somehow joined the chorus of men who thought that women at home  had it easy, a kind of domestic picnic, lounging about glancing through glamour magazines, sipping tea with oranges all the way from China.

We are both torn, and alternate between love and fury between us. It is difficult and when Helvi’s left arm got infected we thought, surely now things will turn for the better. The arm was again operated on yesterday and today Helvi is coming down from the anaesthetics helped with strong pain killers. The wires in her arm were removed and this will give one arm, her left arm, more mobility. As a sign of encouragement a single blue flower ( see below picture)popped up roughly the same time as a year ago.

On the political side; is it still worth looking at the news? Trump is manuring his hatred for everything that is decent and honourable, and things in Australia seem just as dismal.

I haven’t got much time to write and am sorry I haven’t been able to respond to some of you and your blogs. We sometimes put on some music. Helvi likes Leonard Cohen and somehow get almost non-stop of his music through the magic of a Bose speaker and the iPhone through Spotify.

IMG_0095A Star


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18 Responses to “The three weeks to go.”

  1. Yvonne Says:

    It’s such a long, tough grind for both of you. What does Milo do to help around the place? 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Milo gives psychological support with his penetrating loving eyes. He does try and stay out of the way but at times hovers too close to her feet when Helvi is walking. He sits next to her on the couch but every now and then he looks up in a supportive way. I wish he could put on Helvi’s socks or singlet but I think that will take more training.

      Liked by 3 people

  2. popsiclesociety Says:

    Wish you both health and a speedy recovery!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. freefall852 Says:

    Oh, Gerard…Oh, Helvi….When we were young men and women, it seemed (to us males at least) that we spent most of our spare time trying to “make out”….but now in our older age, we seem to be spending an inordinate amout of time just trying to make do!…coraggio to you both…and a little “thought” to share with eachother in this time of need…:

    How do I declare that to thee,
    What is natural as leaf to tree?
    As close a bond as river to reed,
    As smile to laughter!
    Yourself, my need.

    Liked by 4 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      We were infallible when young but now, at latter years, we fall, but…also pick up and continue. It is hard for Helvi and I feel so oafish and unpractical. I should have chosen nursing as a profession. Did I leave it too late now?
      I’ll read Helvi your poem. Very good, Jo

      Liked by 2 people

  4. doesitevenmatter3 Says:

    I love Mr. Leonard Cohen, too! I love his voice and his songs! And I enjoy when other people sing his songs! 🙂
    (Lately, I’ve been listening to some Mr. Joe Cocker.)

    Well, you’ve been a good helper, Gerard! I applaud you! 🙂
    And frustrations are bound to arise, as neither of you have had to go through such an ordeal before. It’s nice to come out of a tough time more appreciative of your spouse. 🙂

    My hubby recently had Tendonitis in his hips and so he went for some Physical Therapy, had exercises to do at home, too, and the PT specialist wanted him to have someone roll a rolling pin up and down both of his legs from his hips to his knees once a day for 4 minutes each time. Ha! You should have seen us! Him lying on his side…little Cooper perched beside him, watching…and me roller-pining his legs…up and down, up and down! Ha! While I was doing that we’d talk of silly things, tell each other jokes, and both of us admitted we were thinking about biscuits, pie dough, pizza dough, and cookies. Nice to know a rolling pin can be good for many things! 😀

    OH! That little blue flower IS a sign of encouragement, hope, life, tenacity and more! How wonderful! 🙂

    Both you and Helvi continue to have our ❤ , best wishes, healing thoughts and (((HUGS)))

    Liked by 3 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      The days go by so quickly and I feel bad not replying to your posts. Things are getting better. Thank you for your kindness. Helvi did go for a walk yesterday but got tired quickly. The TV and movies on ‘Demand’ area Godsent. At the moment we are seeing a Danish family drama over many episodes. It is called ‘Legacy’. It deals with all aspects of human live; love, hatred, art and foibles of relationships.
      Hugs, gerard

      Liked by 1 person

      • doesitevenmatter3 Says:

        Don’t worry about replying to posts!
        My goodness, you have enough to do!
        Just keep helping Helvi and get some rest when you can!
        I am always looking for good things to watch. I’ll see if I can find Legacy.
        Continued <3, healing thoughts and wishes, and HUGS!!! 🙂


  5. leggypeggy Says:

    Oh dear, this turns of events must be so frustrating. Hope everything is back on track soon. Hope Helvi doesn’t bite you when you put in the dentures.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. shoreacres Says:

    The flower is beautiful, and the song is beautiful, and the two of you are beautiful. Ignore the politics, and focus on the good, the beautiful, and the true. It will help.

    Here’s my sunset from a few days ago. With the storm over, the light was taking over again — here’s hoping your storms are over soon, too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Thank you so much, Linda.
      I showed Helvi your sunset photo. She thought it was lovely. Here the day are ever so slowly getting longer and the sun sets at 5.06pm. In Finland the sun hardly sets at all now. A glorious time in those Nordic countries.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. freefall852 Says:

    Hello, Gerard…how does it all progress at the moment?….is it going well?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. algernon1 Says:

    Mrs A got the all clear for her arm two weeks back. She broke hers in November. Still has a few months to full strength.

    I went to dinner with some old work friends during the week. One praised the oranged headed nazi, they said they were a capitalist and he was a capitalist. I suggested that Trump was a modern day Adolf Hitler, they pointed out China was the real problem. I said this bloke wants to start world war three. Their response was bring it on. The Germans were fooled by Hitler in the 1920’s and 30’s. Looks like the Americans are today.

    A speedy recovery for Helvi.

    Liked by 2 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Gee, Algy that must have been a dinner with some political fireworks. In our bowling club we have a few with similar sentiments. I don’t get involved anymore.
      Glad Mrs Algy’s arm is almost back to normal. The surgeon told Helvi it might take a year to get back to full strength. One arm is bad enough but two is a real handicap.

      Liked by 1 person

      • algernon1 Says:

        No not really, it was an interesting end to the evening though, we caught the train back together. I don’t get that some can’t see how dangerous the man is.

        It was fun with Mrs A, had to do all the driving for the first two months, cooking which I enjoy, cleaning not so much and washing etc. Its the 12 months for full strength and the new norm for mobility. I don’t envy you with Helvi’s two broken arms. Improvements soon hopefully.


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