Vapid verbiage from Government. ( and seniors)

Put and call options.

Put and call options.

The problem with old and ageing retirees. They have so much past and much less future. Till some magic pill is discovered that will make us go to two hundred, at the moment the bell tolls for those over seventy. Time is running out. Yet time is also most in supply. There is so much of it. It is no wonder they take to vacuuming and mobility scooters. Their engagements with bowels and Aldi become more important as years go by. It gives us something to talk about.

But, given the latest on the Australian News, Parliamentarians are not any better. While the old might bore us to tears about their toilet plights or daily routines, the Government’s endless drivel about the advantage of five over seven bullet Adler guns is not giving us much relief either. Watching TV News is what drives us more and more to drugs, reading books, scrabble and eating chocolate.

I was surprised when someone knocked on our door. It’s not all that often we get visitors. I opened the door. A girl stood there who kept looking nervously over her shoulder. Was she going to sell me heroin? It turned out there were two of them. She asked if I would look at a magazine. By the look of both of them I was sure it wasn’t a dirty picture book. It turned out to be ‘The Watchtower.’ ‘God is here to save us all’, she started boldly. I smiled friendly and this encouraged her to read something from a biblical St.Paul. I stepped in. I thanked her for the visit and told her I was hard of hearing and strengthened my argument by also telling her that both hearing aids had flat batteries. It was half true. One of the hearing aid was giving me the familiar beep heralding the end of the battery. They left after that unconvincing excuse. My guilt went into automatic.

I have an unfriendly sticker on my door as well: ‘do not knock.’ We used to get so many Foreign Students trying to make us change our Gas and Electricity accounts. We relented a couple of times. Our British neighbours are forever blaming ‘foreigners’ As a general rule, the darker the skin, the more they are suspect. A few weeks ago some plants were stolen. This caused great consternation in our housing compound. Some reckoned it was (dark) Isis, others claimed we stole them ourselves. There is just nothing about some elderly people’s fantasies that eggs them on to the most absurd conclusions. They have all that time. I put up posters stating ‘Thieves About.’ Since then we have installed a CCTV camera and a solar movement device that lights up each time movement is detected outside our front door. I have tried the device out night after night and it works brilliantly. Even after a couple of dark days.

I decided to take one of those Google psychological test to find out if one was still within a range of being normal. The first one came out with a score of 33 which took me to a dangerous level of being psychotic. It urged me to talk to a councillor which had her phone number at the bottom of the test. I was flummoxed. I went downstairs to reflect or relish on the latest gloom. After a disturbing nap, I took a different test. It came out worse. It even had a little red flag. I had apparently mused over the word ‘suicide,’ as a result over a question, ‘have you ever thought about suicide?’ You were to answer; never, sometimes, often or always! I answered ‘sometimes.’ After many question I was urged pronto to immediately seek a good shrink. No guessing their phone numbers were well advertised below. I could understand ‘always’ but just ‘sometimes?’

In any brain are embedded all sorts of possibilities of thoughts. Life, death, birth, young and old, car driving, walking, bungie jumping and…suicide. Not as a desire but food for reflection. I prefer not to restrict my thoughts.

It seems that using a word raises red flags. I would have thought the idea of importing Adler rapid self loading Guns to be far more indicative of the mental state of our Government.

They are the real nuts.

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23 Responses to “Vapid verbiage from Government. ( and seniors)”

  1. Yvonne Says:

    That’s OK, dear old Uncle Tony Rabbit will save us from every darn thing, Gerard.🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. berlioz1935 Says:

    It seems the government is allowing more guns into the country to legislate against the unions. This is crazy stuff. Next, they will say buying a gun is not compulsory.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. auntyuta Says:

    An Adler rapid self loading Gun? I wonder who claims to need such a thing. What for? To shoot people, or what? Does the government want to do someone a favour by importing these things? They say it is “guns for votes”. Isn’t it sad if they think they need the votes of these people who claim they need these guns. Hurrah, anything for a vote. This is our beautiful democracy gone a little of the rails!
    Maybe, just maybe, we are in a war, and for some reason I actually have not become aware of it yet. Are the guns just supposed to be for soldiers so they can defend us in a war? Or maybe our border police needs rapid shooting firearms? What if these guns end up in the hands of criminals? The thought that anyone with enough money to buy such a weapon might be able to acquire one is mind boggling! But be assured, anything the government approves of is for our security. So, no worries, mate!

    Liked by 2 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      They, the Shooters and Fishing party, reckon it is for the love of the sport. But why does the sport has to include self-loading rapid fire Adlers?
      The man on TV giving a demo of the Adler looked a maniac to me. He should do the Google psyche test. I bet he would score a number high in the eighties with psychiatrists knocking down his door.
      There are some dangerous people about. It would make our chairperson an angel. I can hardly imagine she would ever tote around with an Adler Rapid Fire.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Cheri Says:

      I hate to be harsh, but surprise! The criminals already have the guns. Many Jews, surprised at night in their homes and loaded on trains, wished they had had firearms.

      Liked by 1 person

      • gerard oosterman Says:

        Am not sure about this, Cheri. Since the hand-in and buy-back of weapons in Australia was introduced, murder and crime by hand-guns has gone down.
        However, the gun lobby is now trying to soften the gun laws in Australia. Guns are big business!

        Liked by 3 people

  4. Andrew Says:

    Gerard, I have contemplated suicide twice today. Once dealing with Smartone, a HK mobile phone company- 40 minutes to renew my contract – and then in Waitrose (ALDI with lipstick on) trying to use the self-scan checkout. I think an Adler would have been very useful. I thought the watchtower was by Jimi Hendrix.

    Liked by 2 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      You know, Andrew. One can get a bracelet now: do not resuscitate! Something to keep on the back-burner.

      I know all about Mobile Phone and Internet contracts. I just signed two years with Telstra on the new National Broadband Network. No sooner did ink dry, and the changeover happen, the downloads are now slower than with the copper wire.

      It’s funny but those phone help-lines on TV after some News about someone deciding to escape from ‘the right to life’, after almost being comatose from an incurable horror, never come with an encouragement to follow suit.

      We are not so hesitant when proclaiming ‘the right to life’, but not quite so enthusiastic about ‘the right to die’ for those that are faced with endless incurable and unbearable suffering.

      I hope my doctor will be helpful and not too chagrined when I knock on his door. 😉

      Liked by 2 people

  5. Herman Says:

    Another good article. Those do good Christians need to respect ones privacy. The trouble is that when they are in your face, you can never find a LION !

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Herman Says:

    A maniac, I thought the same after seeing his beetroot coloured face the first time. I thought that banning those type of guns is a no brainer. Farmers wanting to get rid of feral pigs should trap and export them. Many people would love to eat them.

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Yes, many pro-shooters go on about shooting pigs as if they can’t be killed by normal guns or baited. It is the particular rapid fire Adler that they want. They can easily be converted to multiple rapid firing bullet capacity by changing the cartridge.

      Like

  7. Big M Says:

    Gerard, you may have noticed our unfriendly sign, ‘NO salesmen and NO Jehovahs Witnesses!’ It seems to work quite well, although tired god-botherers and sales folk may turned off by the length of driveway.

    I’m unsure why we need more Adler shot guns in a country where cross bows and air rifles are considered too dangerous? As for online psychological tests? Don’t do them. You may be the sanest person I know, Gez, although that’s not saying much.

    Liked by 1 person

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Yes, I did indeed noticed the signs, Big M. It is obvious that you also strongly resist being saved.

      We used to terrorise the neighbourhood with catapults or blow pipes with paper darts ripped out of our school books.

      Looking around to those claiming sanity, I remain happily deranged.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Big M Says:

        Yes, Gerard, many are saddened to find themselves depressed in later life, whereas I have been happily melancholic for most of mine!

        Liked by 1 person

      • gerard oosterman Says:

        Yes, it is infuriating all that obsessing about happiness. There is nothing as bad as a bunch of people seeking happiness.

        You see them poring over the IPhone, clicking on dating sites, taking selfies, going to gym, pumping midriffs and Botox.
        Those grim faces show it all.

        Happiness is now.

        Liked by 2 people

  8. shoreacres Says:

    The bell tolls for those over seventy? Well, I have a couple of days left. Maybe I’ll spend them in the nearest pharmacy, stocking up on supplies for my coming decline.🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      I usually take detours around pharmacies. They sell lollies and often are agencies for Cadbury chocolates, sell make-up by the drum-load.

      The chief chemist stands on a podium watching out for school girls snatching lip-sticks and boys taking Mars-bars.

      No, Linda. if I want to eek out a few more days I go for walks and take an extra Shiraz.

      Aspirin is about as deep as I will venture into drugs. Even so, over seventy is considered a decent age and no one gets too upset having reached that age and dipping the candle..

      Like

  9. kaytisweetlandrasmussen83 Says:

    We fortunately don’t get any more “Watchtower” peddlers, I think they think we are too old to save. and they’re probably right. they are maybe 20 years too late. The Mormons don’t bother with us any more either. I’m wondering if we should be worrying? It’s a deep subject. In my case, the turning point came at 13.

    Liked by 1 person

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      We have two Mormon ‘sisters’ living two doors down. They have offered to wash our car. I politely refused because, next you get an invite to a ‘cottage meeting.’ I think they are NZ Mauri girls. The previous people living in the same place were a husband and wife couple. He was ‘an elder’ and she had a tag on her chest with ‘sister’ written on it.
      They too wanted to wash our car. What they really are after is to wash and cleanse our souls, Kayti.
      A kind of spiritual dish washer. Be careful!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. kaytisweetlandrasmussen83 Says:

    It’s too late to worry.

    Like

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