Life Insurance and getting away from Yourself!

My paternal grandparents wedding

My paternal grandparents wedding

It is a bit presumptuous to expect people to read everything or even anything that has been put down in writing. I mean so much is put into writing, everyone has become an author.. Could it be or even follow, that those who do, suffer from self-absorption and are delusional of their own importance. Have we all gone into me, me, and more of me?

Take an Insurance Policy. Who can possibly read a document like that? What does the Insurance Company expect? Well, they largely hope you don’t read it, especially not the fine print. Their aim is for you to fork out the moolah and fervently hope you don’t notice they have excluded any claims you might ever initiate. The most interesting part in reading, in large lettering, is where they jubilantly point out the enormous benefits of what you will get when you are dead.

Of course when you are dead they expect you to prove you died of an unexpected accident before any consideration of the payout that you have insured yourself for. Most deaths are pretty unexpected even when the doctor declares, “well, you’re pretty crook, expect not to wake up tomorrow morning Mr Oosterman, good night!” “Good night doc”, the expiring patient sighs somewhat despondently. The door bangs shut.

Of late the TV on the SBS channel has an almost indecent obsession with running many Life-Insurance advertisements. They sometimes show a couple on a grassy knoll lovingly enjoying a pick-nick. He is situated a bit higher than her, she kind of lingers a bit lower between his firm conjugal legs. Children are even lower down, playing with a hoopla or being chased by a slobbering Labrador. The wife is a bit concerned and puckered-up about the future, but he is beaming and says. “Oh darling, I have just taken out an Accidental Death Insurance and we will be fine when I am dead”. The next shot shows the wife, this time, she beaming, and gloriously optimistic, deep baking a chuck-steak casserole. Husband sits on his desk thumping down his paid Life-Insurance receipt on a special sharp receptacle for receipts. He casually leans back in a black leather office chair, as if a Robert Taylor from Quo Vadis just having slain savage lions and obstinate Christians, all at the same time, against a burning background of Rome…The Insurance Company, not unlike the Peter Ustinov, has grown even fatter!

I have always resisted Insurances. Right now we don’t have a single insurance. That’s right…not even one. The compulsory green slip on the car is the exception. Years ago, my younger brother was a sucker for life insurance. The usual ploy of: ‘Surely, you don’t want your parents to pay for your funeral,’ got him each time.” He would keep payments up for a few years and then just let is slip. He did this several times until I pointed out that a payout after death is of dubious use if not also totally un-spendable.

I mean, so what, if in the event there is no money for a decent burial? Do they keep you bolt upright, stiffly sitting in a bed forever? I don’t know of anyone who remained unburied because he did not have the money. Do they say, while wagging a finger at you, a very dead corpse; ‘sorry, no money- no box, you should have signed up a Life Policy?’ That would be so heartless. Still, a great consolation I forever keep in mind…Mozart ended up having a pauper’s funeral. In an unknown grave and very grave but his music still alive, all glorious and getting better.

And furthermore, what about the weekly event sponsored by Ancestry.com on SBS? Whereby someone, often a famous celebrity or sports hero, trying to find out their great, great, great grandparents with endless forefather’s and foremother’s struggles in ancient life’s so lost and forgotten, only to find out a prostitute, single mother or axe murderer, even bearded convict, lurking about somewhere in those dank Births and Deaths cathedral’s archives.

The result is the close-up tearstained or sunny exultant, (depending on the inherited gene) face of the searchers, fumbling through some frayed document or standing in front of a Czechoslovakian village ruin, pondering the hardships endured two hundred fifty eight years ago just to give, after many generations, birth to you, the present ageing celebrity or kicking-ball sports man of yesteryear and still having to go on with the present stage of life. Me, me and more me!

And so it goes on, Quo Vadis?

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25 Responses to “Life Insurance and getting away from Yourself!”

  1. rod Says:

    This is very well written. Like you, the better half and I have no life insurance, and like you the car is insured because it has to be. On the other hand, I have taken the precaution of never learning to drive it. Too stressful by far. Which is why I married a chauffeuse.

    Liked by 1 person

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      I married a non-driver but you should have seen her carrying huge bay trees away this morning. We had a chainsaw attached to a man who in ten minutes took away what has taken 5 years to grow. We can now get the sun filtering inside again but still feel as if we are living in a forest. Our forest of bay trees is about 7 meters high, magic. Dappled light.
      So pleased about ‘very well written’!

      Like

  2. M-R Says:

    Stringer had his own definition of insurance:
    “Insurance is when you pay the insuring company money, and they keep it.”
    And we never had any, either !😀

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      We have an insurance on the outside because being part of a row of townhouses we carry a ‘body corporate Insurance’. The other owners all love insurance and are totally and ideotically addicted to spending by far the largest amount on Insurance, including $ 50.000.000,- public risk and…wait…earth quake!
      I urged all to do without Insurance; rocks are still raining down on our roof.

      Like

  3. M-R Says:

    I forgot to say that it’s a MARVELLOUS photo of the wedding of your dad’s parents, Gerard ! – an absolute ripper !!! I wonder if it was derigueur to have the photo taken after soup …?

    Like

  4. petspeopleandlife Says:

    I like what you have written. I have minimal life insurance. Just savings. What’s the point of life insurance unless you are young and have a passel of kids and a disabled wife or husband?

    Like

  5. Curt Mekemson Says:

    Have to agree on the insurance Gerard. The insurance companies are in business for one reason: to make as much money as they possibly can. –Curt

    Like

  6. Andrew Says:

    I absolutely infuriate people over contracts because occasionally i do read them When we were signing the legals for the house I noticed a clause that said that if the buyer didn’t pay their stamp duty I would have to do so. Well I should cocoa! Not on your Nelly, I said. The agent went into a state of pallid, gibbering incomprehension. She then spent half an hour on the phone before crossing out the offending words and agreeing that she would get the buyer to initial the alteration. Small print is designed to trick us and I don’t like being tricked. Amex sent me an e mail recently giving me a dozen links to ‘changes in terms and conditions’. I wrote back asking what they were in plain English as I had no desire to spend ages reviewing their legal gibberish. They replied! We have to stand up for our rights.

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Well, good that you found the small print trying to rob you. It is one reason I try not to bind myself into any form of legal contract. Of course, our marital contract passed the test of time for over fifty years. ‘For better of worse’ was a bit ambigeous but we sorted that out amicably. I mean what is better for one could be worse for another.
      I mean vegemite as an example. I will never compromise on eating that stuff, so…Helvi loves it, but eats it out of sight or I simply wear dark sunglasses.

      Like

    • roughseasinthemed Says:

      We had a similar issue in Spain. Law says one thing and custom and practice says another. Thanks, we’ll go with the legal option. I’m not paying your taxes.

      Like

  7. Red Hen Says:

    Wonderful post, Gerard. You could have expanded on any one of those paragaphs and made a whole separate post out of it. The whole me, me. me thing of the first paragraph, for instance…so true. As for super insurance… A lot of fat cats out there selling us playing to our insecurities.
    What an interesting photo, too.

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Yes, Insurance is a real money spinner. Look at skyscrapers in cities, all from your money. The onus of not any claims being made is on their side, hence the sky scrapers and us paying for it. Of course I drive extra careful and so far have managed without a single accident except years ago when i was riding my Triumph motor cycle. Even then it was pretty minor. I just rolled the bike and hit a car going around a corner.

      Like

  8. elizabeth2560 Says:

    I too loathe insurance companies.

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Good, the more loathing of insurance and their reluctance to pay out, the better. During the flooding and earth quakes in Australia and NZ, it took years of legal actions for companies to pay out legitimate claims. They use every trick in the world avoiding paying claims.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Silver in the Barn Says:

    My dear Gerard! I want you to know that you caused me to burst into laughter this morning with coffee half-swallowed and half dribbled down my chin. At what passage in this hilarious piece, you ask? Well, the entire paragraph four was building up to the perfect crescendo and then you nailed it with reference to Peter Ustinov! This is a superb post.

    Like

  10. hilarycustancegreen Says:

    When our children were small, and a friend with three little ones died very suddenly, we took out a short-term insurance on my life which finished when they grew up. That’s when you need it, when you have small dependents. Otherwise, as you say…

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      I don’t think my parents ever had life insurance. We never did. Perhaps it is foolish but I always thought; How come the insurance companies have huge buildings and smart offices while I reside in Struggle Street?

      Like

  11. Patti Kuche Says:

    What a beautiful wedding photo Gerard! For our wedding present, my in-laws offered us the choice of a dinner set or . . . . life insurance policy starters.

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Thank you. It is a beautiful wedding photo. I have to laugh about the offer of ….life insurance policy as a wedding present. What did you chose? My in-laws gave us a beautiful wall hanging and an Arabia tea-pot..

      Like

  12. roughseasinthemed Says:

    Obligatory vehicle insurance. House insurance if needed for mortgage, without mortgage …

    Only reason to have insurance is for third party.

    Like

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