How did it get to 50 ?

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A good friend left a message on our answering service yesterday congratulating us on 50 years of marriage. How did this come about? It only seems like yesterday.

We had totally forgotten. We have never stood still reflecting much on wedding anniversaries. We do of course remember each others birthdays. Christmases too come and go. The important thing is to get up each day and celebrate that marvellous event more than the one yearly or one in fifty years event.

Here is how!

“How did you sleep?” “Very good, how about you?” “Oh, very good, just went for ( a piss) to toilet just once, I think it was at 4.30, or no, it might have been a bit earlier, perhaps 3.30.” “I slept very deeply again afterwards, ‘like an angel’.”You don’t look like an angel, get a haircut today, you look wild, more like a Hottentot.” ” Yes, but then I have to wash my hair, take a shower too.” “So what?” “Have you got a problem, taking a shower?” “No, not that, but it is still too early.” “You are not too early with being banal.” “Yes, I know, feel free! It is not too late. Many would find you very attractive, and you’ve got lovely eyes.” “Get #u&&et.”

“How’s the coffee dear?” “Strong enough?” “Yes, it is a nice one today.” “It’s Lavazza, ground. We are on the last kilo.” “OK, next when it is on special we get two kilo’s again.” “Yes, at Farmers Market.” “I had a stomach cramp during the night.” “I might have eaten too much of the hummus.” “Yes, I noticed you were hoeing into it last night with the crackers too. Were you hungry?” “You’re a very healthy girl, you eat more than me!” “Not as healthy as you will be, emptying the red again.” “Well, you know after the drive from Sydney, one needs a bit of a relaxation.” “You say that every night”. “Yes, I know, but we don’t take any medication, you’ve got to have something”! We don’t smoke, don’t take any medication, live frugally, still have most of our teeth. So what if we drink a bit?” “True, dear, especially if it is a good one”.

“I might go upstairs and check the blogs. Have you looked yet?” “No, I haven’t. I am still tired.” “Oh, there you go again, meckering as usual. Cheer up.” “I am cheery, have you looked at the lilies, another one has opened up, there are now three open”. “Yes, I noticed, make another coffee and take it upstairs”. “Alright dear, I will.”

And that is the answer to how fifty years have passed.( and all too quickly)

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48 Responses to “How did it get to 50 ?”

  1. Yvonne Says:

    Lovely post! Many warm greetings on your 50th (!!) anniversary.

    What is “meckering”, please?

    PS I use exactly the same rationale for having another glass of red wine!

    Like

  2. gerard oosterman Says:

    Thank you Yvonne. ‘ meckering’ is one of those words that did enter our own private vocabularly. I think it springs from German and might mean ‘ whining or whingeing’!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. M-R Says:

    I refuse to cast a vote on this before finding out what your wife thinks about it …!😉

    Like

  4. Master of Something Yet Says:

    Congratulations on fifty years of what appears to have been a riot. And as someone not yet even halfway to such a total, it has been an insight to know such a thing is possible. (Some days I doubt it.)

    Liked by 1 person

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Thank you Master of everything;
      We did not follow any manual or followed precise specifications or have a bill of quantities. No fear of heights might have helped. We both love chicken manure for the garden and Kipfler potatoes on a plate. The simplicity of a sausage on the BQUe. The bark of a dog. The lilt of laughter. A park bench. A walk or nice movie. We love words and talk, talk. A good fight.
      (More will follow on request.)

      Liked by 2 people

  5. berlioz1935 Says:

    People nowadays expect more from a marriage than is actually possible. And when they don’t hear the violin playing all the time they think something is wrong.

    When one gets married one wants to be together (it is a bit easier today) that’s all. It can get a bit banal after a while, but that is life. When people want to be together they don’t ask if the other brushes his or her teeth properly etc.

    People who make a contract will fail, because they don’t trust the other one in the first place.

    Liked by 2 people

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Yes Berlioz,

      We are on a one string violin but so sweet its tune. You are right. Over expectations and fruit juice extracter,pressure cooker love is over-rated. I mean all that orange aromatic, romantic swooning stuff a la Tammy or King and I.

      Give me the love of the mid night flush of the toilet and the breath of slumbering partner anytime. Her look in the mirror while pursing her lips.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. kaytisweetlandrasmussen83 Says:

    May I add my congratulations? Marriage is mysterious condition of the heart. Dr A. and I celebrated our 68th last month. We keep renewing the license so it must be good They said it would never last. Keep the coffee perking!

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      68th. ? clap, clap. Our license is being renewed but have taken off the rear vision mirror from the body of the vehicle. No good looking back. Je ne regrette rien, et all. We do our own marital panel beating and oil changes, change spark plugs but stopped using Redex additive in case of over excitement.
      We sometimes burn the rice or toast a bit, but so what? We still get by on the fruits of love but always compost the peelings.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. hilarycustancegreen Says:

    Wonderful blog, wonderful achievement. We have a little way to go still (and early morning conversation is a tad one-sided) and we drink tea with our morning in-bed read, but we are on the right track.

    Like

  8. degrootefamily Says:

    Congratulations from the de Groote’s. You’re one in a million.

    Like

  9. degrootefamily Says:

    Two in a million!🙂

    Like

  10. Lottie Nevin Says:

    50 years! How wonderful! Congratulations and here’s wishing you many more😀

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Thank you Lottie. There is hope for all of us.

      Like

      • Lottie Nevin Says:

        I’ve notched up 31 years of marital life so far but that’s divided (unequally) between 3 husbands. 50 years married to the same person (and hopefully many more years of wedded bliss to follow) is MAGNIFICENT!

        Like

      • gerard oosterman Says:

        Three husbands better than none. How good were any of them on the domestic front?
        Did they vacume, change nappies…did they walk the talk? I am always intriqued by what makes couples tick. Very curious about marital or even non-marital couplings. I know sex is often the banana skin on the doorstep of happiness but so many other things come into it. I mean after sex and all that heaving, you are still in the same place, not in Hawaii, Alaska or Timbuktu. The gas bill needs paying etc.
        If you see someone peering over the fence, it will be me. I am curious!

        Like

  11. Andrew Says:

    Half a century. What a milestone. Well done to both of you. And red wine is good for you. Mecker not but celebrate the grand occasion.

    Like

  12. Curt Mekemson Says:

    Happy Anniversary to you and your wife Gerard. Love the banter. Down another red one. PS, if I forgot our anniversary, I would be outside hanging from a tree, or begging you to take in a poor, homeless soul. –Curt

    Like

  13. Silver in the Barn Says:

    We are forty years together this past July. How is that possible, we ask, when we are still kids? Whoops, don’t look in the mirror, honey. Oh, Gerard, your lovely honest post made me laugh out loud. A pure delight and as any long time married couple can attest, spot on accurate. Cheers!

    Like

  14. Lilith Says:

    Oh, how I laughed. So sweet and hilarious! I am impressed, never having made it past 3 years with my marriages. I live in hope though, and will from now on be reading to get tips for when I again am married

    Like

  15. algernon1 Says:

    Gerard and Helvi, heartiest congratulations on such a milestone. I feel such a pup comparison (coming up 27).

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Thank you Algy. I am amazed myself. Probably reflects on H’s tolerance of an incorrigible curmudgeon more than anything.
      Twenty seven is pretty good too, well above the average. It must be the love of music.

      Like

  16. petspeopleandlife Says:

    How does that go? “You two are a match made in heaven.” Mrs O sounds very tolerant and not as moody or should I say cranky as you.🙂 Fifty years is a long time. If my husband were living we would have made 50 years last year. Oh how the time flies. I have not figured out how I made it to where I am, today. Odd- that thing called life.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Rosie Says:

    Well done Helvi and Gerard! Keep on enjoying life.

    Like

  18. gerard oosterman Says:

    Nice to see you back Rosie. Thank you.
    How are things?

    Like

  19. Rosie Says:

    I have looked in every now and then but just briefly. Move completed successfully, downsizing achieved. Now able to relax and enjoy retirement. Thank you for asking.

    Like

  20. Big M Says:

    Congratulations Gez n Helvi, 50 years of marriage shows a great deal of patience and self restraint, if not, love. I’m coming up to 29 years, but not all with the same woman!, Only 20 with Mrs M.

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Thanks Big M. Years go by and I love H. the same as ever. She makes me laugh. The self restraint and patience is probably more on her side. I don’t know how she puts up with me. She does and perhaps I make her laugh as well.

      Like

  21. roughseasinthemed Says:

    Belated congratulations. If you don’t know where 50 years have gone I don’t know where 29 have gone. Although I can totally relate to the daily conversation. Where would our relationships be without aimless banter about our daily lives?

    Like

    • gerard oosterman Says:

      Yes, and we enjoy the banter. As soon as both of us get up we get going! How did you sleep etc. What time did you go to the loo? Did you get a cramp in your leg again. As if it is the most urgent and immediate bit of excitement or news we both can’t wait to hear.

      Like

      • roughseasinthemed Says:

        Which just goes to prove I’m old before my time, or maybe you’ve been having those conversations for the past 30 years? (She adds hopefully)

        Like

      • gerard oosterman Says:

        No not old. Tedious useless banter are the bricks and mortar of love and the luscious clover of long everlasting relationships. Forget about anything profound or penetrating deep insights. Leave that to those fascinating divorced couples.
        I think you’re on the right track. Just keep going!

        Like

  22. anay007 Says:

    Congratulations on such a milestone!!! My parents are the same – the banter keeps it exciting🙂

    Like

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