The ‘Birthday box of useful Presents’.

many years ago

many years ago

It is here again. I had forgotten but face-book reminded me of a looming birthday. Is there no escape? How do they know all those details. Does the IT world now also check up on my underwear swinging in morn’s breeze? Will I get reminders to shower or cut my nails? I had a twitter message from a far away relative in Finland. Can you believe this? The whole world seems to anticipate my own and utterly single future event. There is still time for me to cark it before this 7th of August has even arrived. Such optimism is wonderful. I stand in awe and am so grateful.

Not only that, but the Goulburn Workers Club posted me, by normal mail, a ‘happy birthday’ including four gifts. I can spend up to $25.- on a meal and get the same value of a second meal gratis. I could sneak out to Goulburn and order two huge meals all by myself or…invite the lovely H to participate and share this feast with…a free middy of beer or…a free glass of house wine, each. It doesn’t stop there. The third gift is a token of $ 5.- to play Keno. I never played Keno but it is never too late. It sounds terrific. The fourth and final gift is a chance to win $ 500.- and simply place the ticket in the drum of ‘happy birthday members’. It just never stops.

Problem of birthdays for those of advancing years is what to want to receive. I would like a nicely wrapped box with a ribbon (blue) of blissful uninterrupted sleep without having to go up to four times a night to the toilet. That would be nice. Another one would be to be able to drink half a bottle of fine red wine without having to suffer up to a fortnight of racking indigestion with an unforgiving brooding sense of an overriding guilt that can only be relieved by copious amounts of a smooth all absolving large bucket of butter milk.

Another fine gift would be a large box of instant recall of names and useless memories and events of all those years gone by. Who wrote this book? What was the name of that politician or this actress? What was the time we sat in the park and a bird snatched our sandwich was that before or after we visited Genoa? Do you remember the name of the captain on the Roma that you danced with?

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14 Responses to “The ‘Birthday box of useful Presents’.”

  1. M-R Says:

    Delightful. I get an email wish from a technical forum I used to be a member of …
    I used to play that Waltz in A Minor, and loved doing so. I remember my beloved father wandering in to listen …
    Anyway, HB for Thursday, regardless !!!


  2. Andrew Says:

    Advance wishes winging your way, Gerard. All good suggestions for gifts. The problem with the IT world is that they get it wrong. Google insists my birthday is in March. It isn’t. And they don’t allow you to edit it. And so in March I received copious HB greetings and so I declared that I would emulate the monarch and have 2 birthdays in future. My Google Bidet (when I ascended to the throne perhaps?) and my true birthday. And that reminds me of the old musical quip…. not now, I’m Bizet.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. gerard oosterman Says:

    Good one Andrew, and I bet most of his music was inspired on the Bizet.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. kaytisweetlandrasmussen83 Says:

    How sweet to see all you “children” worrying about your advancing ages. When you reach 86 you will see that none of those so-called gifts they offer are worth a darn. Nothing comes free. As to the loss of names etc. that’s what Google is for. We received an invitation yesterday offering us meals at 5.75 apiece delivered to our home. Maybe when we get old we can take a look. The ones which bother me are the phone calls which say at the onset “Don’t hang up!” at which time I do. I suppose we should be happy that they are all out there thinking of us.
    By the Way, Happy Birthday Gerard! Don’t sweat the small stuff—and it’s all small stuff.


  5. Curt Mekemson Says:

    Happy birthday Gerard. At 71 I get the age bit, although I’ve had my plumbing worked on. One trip a night does it. As for names and such, I’ve never been able to remember them. So no loss there. And one final thought, the memory of the bird snatching the sandwich is what counts. Those are the precious moments. –Curt


  6. hilarycustancegreen Says:

    Happy Birthday! Can I share your birthday box, it sounds ideal?


  7. sandshoe Says:

    My sister used to play the Chopin Waltz Gez and the recall of it wafting out of the living room is a sweet memory.

    Your writing is not just prolific Gez and important, but the strength of it seems to me a presence, it’s immediate, it is the voice of a rich merging of cultures and humility. I think I will never see a more remarkable experience than this of getting to know people through the miracle that the technology has enabled. Otherwise how would we even know we existed at all let alone you write this fabulous blog. You are a master of this artform, Gez. I wish I could believe in miracles. We could all do it. x


  8. gerard oosterman Says:

    That is a very nice response Shoe. I enjoy writing down words and when I see that some of you enjoy reading them it gives me great pleasure and satisfaction.
    How are you travelling? You have a special way with words that I too admire.


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